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9 Sep 2018

Girl Talk | Is there such a thing as 'The One'?

Admittedly, I started writing this post focusing on the question 'how do you know when you've found the one?' But as I was writing I started to really question was there actually such a thing as 'the one'. As I got further into the post the more I started to feel like maybe there isn't so I had to scrap it and start again.

Is there such a thing as 'the one'?

For as long as I can remember I've always believed in 'the one'. Y'know that one person who God made with you in mind. Your soulmate, that one person you're destined to spend the rest of your life with. The Jack to your Rose, the Noah to you Allie (yep I was a SUCKER for a romantic movie, anything Nicolas Sparks was right up my street and I must have watched 'A Cinderella Story' around 50 times.)

My early teen years were spent daydreaming about what it will be like when I meet that perfect somebody. I thought that when I meet him my world would light up and angels would rejoice, ha dramatic much!

I wondered what he was doing right now and believed that our love was written in the stars, the only question was when we would cross paths and find each other.

Maybe that's right, maybe it is all set in motion since the beginning of time, maybe it is fate, maybe there is someone who is meant to be the half that makes you whole.

But as I've gotten older, dated more people and had more experience, I personally kinda believe that maybe it's less to do with fate and more to do with choice.

Maybe you choose the one.

Hear me out, what if there are many people who are the 'one' for you. I'm not just talking about romantic relationships here, I mean friendships too. 

Throughout our lives, we are constantly meeting people who we get on well with. Who we have similar interests and senses of humour with. Who we share common values, dreams and ideas. Some may stick around and become lifelong friends, some may just become a pleasant memory but they are all people we are compatible with.

Maybe the person we end up with is just one of these people.

Spending your entire life with someone is a huge deal. No matter how compatible you two are you are still completely separate individuals and when you think about it, the idea of marriage or committing life to each other is a bit crazy!

I believe 'the one' you're meant to be with has nothing to do with fate, it's whoever you choose it to be.

Relationships are hard. They have their ups and downs, they aren't always a walk in the park and they take a lot of work.

 But when you care about that person, respect them and love them you make the conscious decision to work on that relationship, to nurture it and make it grow, because you know it is worth it. 

That to me is choosing that they are your 'one'.

So what do you think? Do you believe in fate and 'the one' or are you leaning more towards my theory? Have you found the one and did you have an epiphany like the one I imagine when I was a teen? I would love to know what your thoughts are on the whole topic. Chat to me in the comments and we can open up a little discussion!

Sinéad x

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